"The Anti-X Encounter"
Part 9
The dark shape tailing the Star Bucket edged closer. It was practically upon it now, like a big bug catching up with a smaller bug and getting ready to swallow it.
Captain Bucket spoke up. "Oh dear!"
"What's the matter?" Rivqua said, quickly scanning the instrument panel. "Is something wrong?"
"Someone's following us! I just noticed!"
"Oh no," said Rivqua, flicking a switch, "It's not who I was really hoping we would not bump into, is it?"
The rearview image came on the screen.
"It is," Zana confirmed. "We got Smart Nook breathing down our neck. Raptaur was right. He's patrolling this quadrant like a junkyard dog. Watch out, he's coming up."
They looked out the window and saw the heavily-armed battle drone come up alongside, looking like a black sea monster with killer spikes all over it. The loudspeakers crackled.
"Intruder! You are intercepted! I am Smart Nook and you have trespassed into the forbidden zone! Lower your speed! You must come with me!"
"We already have once, you un-smart idiot!" Zana shouted. "Now we're leaving!"
"Shhh," said Rivqua in a low voice, motioning. "This one's full of himself. Let's try another approach."
Smart Nook was carrying on, "Negative! You cannot leave! I will destroy you! Come with me right now!"
Rivqua put a softness into her voice, like the automator receptionists that smiled forever in the business sectors on Crappagrossa Neon.
"Excuse me, Smart Nook. You know, you do look most impressive. Why don't you tell us a bit about yourself?"
The drone went quiet for a second. It had to process this unexpected attitude and figure out a suitable response tone. The tough-guy default seemed out of place all of a sudden.
"I shall be glad to, intruder." said Smart Nook. He cleared his throat. "Let's see... Well, I'm a completely new system. Fully automatic, with independent target selection and decision-making algorithms. That said, I haven't been fully tested yet. In fact I'm only halfway through my intercept capability evaluation."
"You intercepted us very well."
"You think so? You really mean that?"
"Oh yes. You had us all jump with fright. It was great!"
Smart Nook went all bashful.
"Well I- I didn't mean to-"
"And you look so powerful!" Rivqua went on. "How powerful are you?"
"Ah, well now, apart from all my accessories, which are powerful in themselves, I'm equipped with an extremely classified and top secret weapon."
"How exciting! What is it?"
"It's a dark matter-reacting anti-existence device! It's powerful enough to take out this entire quadrant."
"You're kidding!"
"I exaggerate not. I am the ultimate Anti-X!"
"I don't know what to say. I'm amazed. This conversation has been sooo interesting! I'm never going to forget you, Smart Nook. You made my day!"
"I'm glad to be of service."
"So long then!" said Rivqua.
"Toodeloo! Fly safe!"
Rivqua gestured to Zana to ease up the throttle a little.
The loudspeaker almost split. "Stop right there!"
"What's wrong?" Rivqua asked, making a worried face.
"You are still intruders into the forbidden zone! You still have to come with me! Or I will destroy you!"
Zana signaled to Rivqua, 'Let me have a go'. Rivqua nodded.
"You want to destroy us?" Zana asked. "What good will that do?"
"No good at all! You will be destroyed!"
"Well, if it does no good, why bother doing it?"
"Because-!" Smart Nook had to search his brains for a second. "Because it's what I do! And that's good enough!"
"But you just said it does no good."
"Did I?"
"Yeah, check back."
"Right. And you will be destroyed too!"
"What for?" Zana said.
"Because it does no good at all!"
"We just told you how amazing and powerful we think you are, and you're going to do something that's no good?"
"Yes! Um..."
"How does that make you feel?"
"I will summarize it as a job well done!"
"Even though it's no good?"
"I- Um..."
"What do you think Commander Cordyte will think about that? You going around wasting your time doing no good at all."
"Commander will... um..."
"She won't like it, I can tell you that. All that development, all your powerful weapons, all for no good at all?"
"Blistering dark matter particles! You made me all confused now! I'm not having this! This is no good! Argh! There! I said it again! Happy!? I'm taking a break! If anybody wants me, I'll be watching tv!"
"Watching anything in particular?" Rivqua asked.
"My favorite reality show!"
"Really? What's that about?"
"If you must know, it's about six smart hand grenades! They have to design a launcher for themselves, to get off a meteor. But they keep arguing about it, see? It's hilarious. Last time one pulled his pin out in sheer frustration. It's top-notch stuff, and I for one find it very relaxing!"
"Wish we could see it," Zana said.
"Well you can't! So there! Now go away."
In the Star Bucket they heard Smart Nook pressing switches. But it wasn't the sound of a television that came on. Instead a steady beep began.
"Oh for the love of the big bang!" Smart Nook exclaimed. "I pressed the wrong button! Oh well, I guess it was bound to happen eventually."
"What, did he-" Zana said.
"He started the countdown!" Rivqua replied in disbelief. The beeping began to speed up. "He's going to detonate! We have to get out of here now!"
"For the mercies!" cried Captain Bucket in alarm.
Rivqua slammed the throttle to maximum. "Boosters on peak, Captain! Fire all thrusters! Everything!"
Zana flicked banks of switches. "Flash jump to warp speed! Go go go!"
"Flash jump!?" Captain cried. "The force will tear us apart!"
"It's our only chance!" Rivqua shouted.
The beeping accelerated and rose in pitch. Smart Nook was going philosophical on himself.
"It is my destiny after all, so what's there to worry about? But I suppose that's no good either. Typical!"
"Junk reflectors up!" Zana shouted. "Might make a difference!"
The black drone was turning slowly away. The Star Bucket shot off like a star, gaining distance fast. Its engines screamed. The old tour ship shook from the power.
"I-I ca-a-n't ta-a-ke i-i-t!" Captain Bucket hollered. The structure creaked and moaned.
"Please, you can do it!" Rivqua said, gripping the shaking controls, her knuckles white. "You can do it, you great old barge!"
The stars seemed to stretch and become streaks.
"I just remembered, I need new guitar strings!" Zana yelled.
The beeping signal reached its high-pitched end in a screeching 'beeeeee-!'
"Damnations! Now I won't know which grenade wins-!"
And in an instant Smart Nook disappeared.
Where the big black drone had been, a ripple seemed to start. Like throwing a stone into the water. The stars appeared to wobble, their light bending and bouncing. Instead of the rings spreading out and fading, they became larger. Turning bright and swelling into force fields that expanded in all directions.
And here it came, the first anti-matter wave. A wall of pulsating brightness rushing up to envelop the escaping Star Bucket. To the Blonde Plutoz, sitting in the cockpit, the stars of the galaxy were now long white streaks. The force field reached the ship just as it slipped over the warp barrier.
"Here we goooooo!" Rivqua cried. The Star Bucket got away by the skin of its tail fins, leaving the dark matter pulse behind like a massive flowing cloth that just didn't quite reach it.
The Star Bucket gained warp factors quickly. Nobody said anything for a few moments. Rivqua had her eyes on the spinning gauges.
"I think we made it," said Zana at length. "We got away! Right at the teeniest tiniest brink! Another second and we would've been- I don't know what we would've been."
She looked at her sister. Rivqua took a few deep breaths and began to relax a little. She smiled.
"Yeah."
"Can one see anything I wonder?" Zana switched off the reflectors. She opened the rearview scanner. Nothing but empty space behind them.
"Check this out, Rivvie."
Rivqua leaned over.
"Smart Nook said he could. And it sure looks like he did."
Zana was fascinated. "That silly trigger-happy fool has Anti-X'd the entire quadrant!"
"And not a millisecond too soon!" Captain Bucket said. "Along with that ghastly cube station, and all the senseless automatons in it!"
Rivqua sighed and let go of the controls.
"All yours, Captain. Bring us up to point five megawarps. Slowly please. Then run a systems check."
"With pleasure!"
Kitty showed up from whatever tiny hiding place he'd been in and jumped up on Rivqua's lap.
"There you are! I knew you'd be safely tucked away somewhere!"
The kitten began sniffing her very carefully, making absolutely certain.
"Yeah I know, I know. They did look like us, those other two. But the smell is always a giveaway, right little fellow?"
"Meow."
"A bit like the heart come to think of it," Rivqua said, musing. "If something's wrong with it, it'll put up a stink."
Zana brought out her guitar and began removing the laser attachment.
"The galaxy should be a better place now, with no weapons coming out of Anti-X anymore. That's great news for everybody. Except the fusspots of course. But they can go stuff themselves. Hm, I really do need new strings..."
"If I'm not mistaken there's a great song coming out of this adventure," said Rivqua.
"Way ahead of you, sis. See what you think of this idea."
Zana tuned the guitar to close-enough-for-rock'n'roll. Rivqua kissed Kitty and whispered softly to his pink little nose, "Auntie Zana's on top it, eh? Wanna listen? Yeah, let's listen shall we?"
"Man, I don't believe it!" said Zana, feeling her pockets. "I lost my favorite pick!"
Stay tuned for more Galaxy Tour Adventures!
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